Dem Bones, Dem Bones...

I'VE always found it amusing whenever Portuguese folk circumnavigate the Anglo-Saxon word 'toes' and, instead, refer to 'the fingers of the foot.' At the same time, I'm sure the Portuguese find it bizarre whenever I advance the quizzical English notion that fish are in possession of bones. There are no 'ossos' (bones) in Portuguese fish, you know, just 'espinhas' (spines). Far be it for me to cite Wikipedia, particularly after all the nasty and inaccurate things they say about me, but it does appear to have a section on 'fish bones'. Perhaps, if I had attended the fifth conference on “Interdisciplinary Approaches in Fish Skeletal Biology” that was held in the Algarve back in April 2018, I would have solved this terminological mystery once and for all? Well, let's face it, nothing is really what we humans say it is and a 'tree' is not a 'tree' in the mind of a dog. In retrospect, consciously altering the meaning of things might lead to an entirely new experience and in the event that I happen to sit on a riverbank I shall allow the 'fingers' of my feet - all thirteen and a half of them - to be nibbled by a boneless shoal from the etymological depths. Meanwhile, next time I feast upon one of these contentious aquatic creatures I shall pretend not to notice the 'bones' at all. Even if it kills me.