Monkey Business

WITH eight out of forty-three monkeys from the South Carolina 'research facility' still at large after a week of living it up in the wilds of Yemassee, and good luck to them, it is debateable whether the worst-case scenario is another engineered pandemic or the fact that these poor creatures have to return to their usual diet of peanut butter and jelly sandwiches.

It's enough to have thousands of human toddlers clamouring at the gates for the chance of sampling birthday food three times a day, although it might come with a heavy price once the modern-day Mengeles get hold of them.