Sk-queued Logic

HERE in Portugal, certain of the larger shops and markets now include what can only be described as priority queue-jumping ("caixa prioritária"). Indeed, those people who are elderly, disabled, pregnant or accompanied by children can gain immediate access to the front of the line at the expense of their frowning compatriots. I can understand the "caixa prioritária" rule being applied on public transport, especially when somebody with a disadvantage clearly has more need of a seat than an individual who is both young and healthy - not that enforced rules should ever have to replace common human decency, of course - but the only possible advantage for someone of an advanced age to receive preferential treatment is surely because they can enjoy the illusion that their rapidly diminishing lives have been extended by a period of approximately five minutes, whilst anyone under sixty years-old is expected to relinquish five minutes of theirs. I recently estimated, for example, that over the course of the last four weeks I have moved seven hours and thirty-five minutes closer to my own appointment with the Grim Reaper.

Queuing is a controversial topic at the best of times and I am tempted to believe that ideological factors would lead social darwinists to fight their way to the front, anarchists to avoid the queue altogether and spend their time grazing in the fruit and vegetable department, liberals to spend the entire time at the back (grinning inanely and apologising), capitalists to get someone else to queue on their behalf, and communists to link arms and queue cheek-by-jowl (in theory, naturally, because whilst all queuers are equal, some queuers will always be 'more equal' than others).